Accept Your Weaknesses

This will be short.

       Let me begin with one of my favorite stories…

       On her way home, a woman was walking on the sidewalk.  She saw a parrot in a pet shop window.  Upon seeing her, the parrot said, “Lady, you are really ugly!”

       Shocked, the woman walked away in a huff.

       The next day, she walked again on the same road.  She saw again the parrot peering through the pet shop window.  And sure enough, when the parrot saw her, it said, “Lady, you are really ugly!”

       The woman couldn’t take it anymore…

       She barged in the pet shop and told the owner, “Your bird outside has been telling me that I’m ugly.  You better do something about that parrot.  When I walk here tomorrow, and that bird says the same thing about me, I’ll sue you!”  The owner was very apologetic and said, “It won’t happen again, Ma’am.”

       The next day, she walked home on that same road.  Once again, she sees the parrot, and the parrot sees her.  She stopped and with an icy stare asked, “Yes?”

       The bird, strutting back and forth, cocked, “You know.”

You Don’t Have To Be Perfect To Love Yourself

       Friends, many of us have an inner parrot that tells us, “You’re ugly.”

       We have an inner parrot that we carry around within us, cruel and rude.  We actually don’t need the devil anymore to accuse us and damn us to Hell.  Because we do it ourselves.

       These feelings of shame drive us to our addictions.

       Friend, fire your inner parrot.  (Better yet, fry him with olive oil, a little garlic, and chilli.)

       Start telling yourself the truth: That you’re God’s child and beautiful beyond imagination.  And that God will use even your worst weaknesses.

       Remember: You don’t have to be perfect to be loved.

Your Weakness Is A Gift

       In the Bible, St. Paul boasted of his “Thorn in the Flesh”. 

       It was his weakness.

But whatever it was, about this weakness, he said these immortal, mind-boggling words.  “At first I didn’t think of it as a gift, and begged God to remove it. Three times I did that, and then he told me, “My grace is enough; it’s all you need. My strength comes into its own in your weakness.”  (2 Corinthians 12:7-10)

       How can your weakness be gift?

Your Weakness Blesses You In 3 Great Ways

          First, my weaknesses humble me.  It makes me depend in God even more.  And I see how He uses me mightily despite all my weaknesses!  That is why the Bible says, God chooses what the world considers weak in order to shame the powerful. (1 Corinthians 1:27)

Second, my weaknesses make me more merciful towards others.  I believe that someone who easily judges others hasn’t yet accepted his own weaknesses.  If he had, he wouldn’t be judgmental.  But because he hasn’t, he projects his self-anger towards other people.

Third, my weaknesses bond me with others in a way that nothing else can.  When I share the story of my past and my addiction to someone else, I disrobe my defences and become vulnerable to him.  In this way, I also give permission to that person to disrobe his defences as well.

          Friend, thank God for your weaknesses, your struggles, and your problems.

          They are great gifts that will bless you and others.

Next week, I’ll share with you the third way of loving yourself.

May your dreams come true,

Bo Sanchez

Focus On Your Ambition, Not Your Addiction

 (Bo’s Note: I wrote this sometime back, and I remember people coming up to me—with tears in their eyes—telling me how these words gave them freedom from their bondages.  So I decided to share it with you again.  Enjoy and be very blessed… )
 Focus On Your Ambition,Not Your Addiction
          Have you noticed?
We’re an illogical bunch.
          At various times, we act like Esau…
Jacob and Esau were twin brothers.
But Esau was considered the eldest because he went out of the womb of his mother first.
          One day, Jacob was cooking some stew.
Esau arrived from hunting and was exhausted and hungry.  Esau said to Jacob, “I’m starved.  Give me some of your red stew.”
          Now Jacob said something absolutely nutty.  He said, “All right, but you’ve got to do one thing first.  Trade me your rights as the firstborn son.”  You get an inkling on how jealous Jacob must have been towards his twin brother.
         But what was nuttier was Esau’s reaction.  He said, “Sure!  Now give me that red stew now.”
        Jacob said, “You’ve got to swear first that you’re giving me your birthright…”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah… whatever!  I swear!  Now give me that lentil soup…”.       Now why would Esau exchange his birthright for a single bowl of red stew?
       Was his brain taking a vacation on that day?  Was it surfing in Camsur or gone shopping in Hongkong?  Didn’t Esau know what his birthright meant?  Being firstborn meant a position of privilege.  Being firstborn meant great honor.  And yes, being firstborn meant a huge inheritance—where he can buy a swimming pool filled with red stew if he wanted.
       Why was he throwing all that for a bowl of red stew today?       Friends, this is a great picture of what addiction is…

(By the way, I’m not saying Esau was addicted to red stew.  I’m merely using his story as an analogy.)

The Foolish Exchanges We Make     
I met a man who threw away his entire family for drugs.  Years ago, he had a great job, a nice home, two kids, and a beautiful wife.  Today, because of a bunch of chemicals he was snorting through his nostrils, he destroyed his life.  He’s lost his job and his home.  His kids hate him and his wife is seeing another man…
Why exchange all that for another whiff of shabu?
       There’s no logic.  It’s a foolish exchange.
       One day, a woman asked for my help.  She said, “My husband is a compulsive gambler.  He stole money from his office and used it to gamble.  His boss found out about it and is pressing charges.  My husband’s going to jail!”
       Why exchange a great job for another crack at the blackjack table?
       Again, it’s a foolish exchange.
The list goes on.
·      A chain-smoker, exchanging his health for another nicotine fix.
·      A porn-addict, exchanging his dignity and mental-monogamy, for another testosterone fantasy.
·      A woman who gives her body to yet another man, just so that he would love her, exchanging her self-respect for a fleeting embrace.
·      A government employee taking a bribe, exchanging his honour for cash.  After years of doing it, he no longer feels any guilt, his conscience virtually dead.

One Power Skill Of Mature People        On a superficial level, the problem is impatience and impulsiveness.
       And boy, do I know impulsiveness.
       Like Esau, I catch myself wanting it now—no matter what the cost is to my future.  Like Esau, I want my red stew now, whatever my “red stew” is. For me, it could be internet porn, sexual fantasies, and the approval of people.  (For my full story on how God healed my addictions, read my book, Your Past Does Not Define Your Future.)
Impulsiveness means I prioritize my short-term wants over my long-term needs.
Which takes us to that very important, essential, powerful skill that all mature people have: The ability to delay gratification.  You can’t be emotionally and spiritual mature without it.  It’s impossible.
Delaying gratification is the power skill of champions.  In any field!
       Because there’s a huge reward in front of them, champions sacrifice today so that they can get their reward tomorrow.
       Do you want to become a champion?
       What great reward are you aiming for?
       What is your holy ambition?


Anatomy of An Addiction

Deep inside, there’s a (1) real need. And that real need is an empty love tank.  Bottom line, the addict doesn’t love himself.  The addict doesn’t value himself.  The addict doesn’t respect himself.  Sometimes, he is conscious of this desperate need for love.  Many times, he isn’t aware of it.  It’s all unconscious.
My personal interpretation of the Esau-Jacob story above is that Esau didn’t value his birthright because he didn’t value himself.  He didn’t value his future.
Once again, let me state my central point:  I believe that every addiction is a hunger for love.  That’s the real need behind every addiction.  Your hunger of love produces the second part of the equation: (2) painful feelings—such as depression, anger, fear, anxiety, loneliness, etc.
To escape these painful feelings, the addict will pick a preferred anaesthesia.  That anaesthesia is the third part of the equation: (3) addiction.  It could be gambling, drugs, and alcohol.  It could be workaholism until one’s family breaks down.  Or shopping until five credit cards are maxed out.  Or food until one becomes obese.  Or dieting until one becomes very sick.
In order for an addiction to get healed, the real needs must be met.  The love tank must be filled.
       Thankfully, you can do that in many ways as we discussed in my last article.
       In getting rid of their bad habits, I share to them one of the most powerful—and controversial—principles…

Don’t Focus On Your Addiction…
       Bear with me.  Do this exercise for me.
Say out loud “I won’t think of a Pink Elephant” for five times.
       Ready?  Go…

       “I won’t think of a Pink Elephant.”
       “I won’t think of a Pink Elephant.”
       “I won’t think of a Pink Elephant.”
       “I won’t think of a Pink Elephant.”
       “I won’t think of a Pink Elephant.”

       Let me ask you a question: What are you thinking of right now?

       A Pink Elephant, of course.

       People who want to overcome their addictions end up focusing on their addictions, and it simply won’t work.
       When a smoker says, “I won’t smoke anymore!” 300x a day, guess what fills his mind?  Smoking his favorite Marlboros, what else?
       When a compulsive eater says, “I won’t eat!” 300x a day, guess what fills his mind?  Eating his favorite cheeseburgers and chocolate sundaes.
       When you focus on your bad habits, you enter into a vicious cycle that buries you deeper into your addiction.  You end up depressed and helpless, draining your love tank even more, making you open more to your addictions.
       Look.  I’m not saying you deny that you have an addiction.  In fact, acknowledging that you have an addiction is the first step to healing it.  By admitting you’ve got a problem, you solve 50% of your problem.  But you see, there’s a big difference between acknowledging it andfocusing on it 24 hours a day.

A Simple Principle of The Universe
       Let me share to you a simple, powerful, universal principle that has guided me in my daily life:

What you focus on grows! Let me sidetrack a bit and explain this principle to you.
I know some people who focus on the bad things in their day.
They wake up in the morning feeling lousy.  “It’s a terrible day,” they mutter.  They ride to work complaining about how hot it is.  They wade through the traffic complaining about the crazy drivers on the streets.  They arrive at their office complaining the workload on their desks.  They complain about their boss, the low pay, the slow internet, the over-time, the terrible food at the cafeteria, and how cold the air-conditioning is.
I pity them.  Because the more they complain, the more they feel miserable.
Sooner or later, they experience more problems.  (Remember, what you focus on grows.)
First, they may get sick.  The Bible says a cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.[1]  Medical studies have shown that most of our physical diseases are psychosomatic.  A negative spirit may create ulcers, hypertension, and other diseases.  Simply because our bodies are blueprints of our emotional life.
Second, they may lose friends.  Because no one wants to talk to a whiner.  About her, they’ll say, “She’s depressing and it may be contagious!”
Third, they may lose their job—or at the very least, a promotion.  Someone who doesn’t have passion in his work will not be rewarded.  200 CEO’s were asked what’s the number one ability that they look for in their employee, and most of them said, “The ability to work with others.”  It’s not technical skills, but relational skills that are prized in companies.
       Okay, my digression is enough.  How does this apply to your hidden addiction?

Focus On Your Ambition
       Instead of focusing on your addiction, focus on your ambition.
       “Ambition” has a negative meaning today, so let me purify this word.
       By ambition, I mean your vision for your future.
By ambition, I mean the dreams that God has placed in your heart.
So instead of saying, “I’ll stop smoking” 300x a day, say instead, “I’ll be healthy and run the marathon” or “I’ll be healthy and be a Class A badminton player.”
Instead of saying, “I’ll stop eating”, say, “I’ll be healthy, weigh a healthy120 pounds, go to the gym three times a week, play badminton twice a week…”
Instead of saying, “I’ll stop shopping everyday,” say, “Starting next month, I’ll save P5,000 a month, erase all credit card debt by December 2013, and start investing in the Stock market by February 2013, and accumulate P300,000 by December 2015.”
When you focus on your addiction, it depresses you.
When you focus on your ambition, it fuels you with passion.
And what happens when you do that?  As you take baby steps towards fulfilling your ambition, you value yourself more.  You gain confidence.  You gain self-respect.  Little by little, love is being poured into your Love Tank.  The cravings are still there, but they lose its urgency and intensity.

Make Your Dreams MAGIC Dreams
Each Sunday, I preach to 9000+ people in PICC (For more information, call Tel (632) 7259999).  Each Sunday, I teach them how to dream.  So I wrote a Novena to God’s Love Prayer Booklet and gave it to each of them.  (All first timers receive it.)
In that Novena, I ask people to write 7 dreams that they will pray for everyday.  Believe me, people were excited writing down their dreams!
And as they pray for them, I ask them to also take baby steps towards fulfilling them.  In the Novena, I also give instructions that their dreams should be….MAGIC!
       By MAGIC, I mean…

M-   MeasurableDon’t just write, “Have a happy family”; Write instead, “Have a happy family by having separate weekly dates with my spouse and each child starting August 2015”;  Don’t just write, “Have more money”; Write instead, “Earn an additional P15T each month through a side-line by December 2013.”

A -   AmbitiousAgain, I use “ambition” without its negative meaning.  By “ambition”, I simply mean dreaming big dreams!  Small dreams won’t excite you.  But even if they’re ambitious, let your dreams also be attainable at the same time.

G -   GodlyNever dream from greed or selfish ego.  They will make you empty and miserable.  Instead, discover the dreams that God has placed in your heart.  The fulfilment of these dreams should ultimately help you love God and others more.  (And don’t you notice?  G is at the middle.  God should be the center of our dreams.)

I -   ImaginativePut details in your dream.  Make it graphic.  Don’t just write, “Own a house by 2016.”  Describe what kind of house you want.  “Own a 2-bedroom white house with a small garden in Laguna by 2016.”

C – Complete    Have dreams that touch the most important aspects of your life: Spiritual, Family, Financial, Physical…  By succeeding in all areas, you attain Life Balance.

Wise Exchange, Anyone?
       Yesterday, I read a beautiful story.
       One day, a little girl named Jenny was with her mother in the grocery store.  She saw a toy pearl bracelet worth P20.  She became giddy with excitement and asked her mother to buy it for her.  “Are you sure you like it?” her mother asked.
       “Yes, Mommy!  Please, please, please buy it for me!”
       So the mother bought the toy pearls for little Jenny.
       Jenny’s father, who loved her very much, read a bedtime story to Jenny each night.  One night, after reading to her, he asked her, “Jenny, do you love me?”
       “Of course I love you, Daddy,” she said.
       “Can you give me your pearl bracelet?” he asked.
       Little Jenny pouted.  “You can have my princess doll, Daddy, but not my pearl bracelet.  That’s my favorite.”
       Daddy smiled, “That’s okay Jenny, I love you.”  He kissed her good night.
       Seven days later, after another reading session, the father asked again, “Jenny, do you love me?’
       “Daddy, you know that I love you,” the little girl said.
       “Can you give me your pearl bracelet?” he smiled.
       “No Daddy, please.  You can have my brush, my violet pen, and my red hair band.  But not my pearl bracelet!”
       He chuckled.  “That’s okay, hon. I love you,” and kissed her goodnight.
       But a few days later, a teary-eyed Jenny came to her father and said, “Daddy, I love you very much,” and placed in his hand her toy pearl bracelet.
       Her father gave her a big hug and said, “I have a very special gift for you, little girl.”  He pulled out from his pocket a beautiful velvet case with gold lining.  He opened it, showing to her a genuine pearl bracelet. “This is yours.  No more toy pearl bracelet for you, my princess.  You deserve the real one.”
       Friends, this is the kind of wise exchange that God wants to give to us.
       Not foolish exchanges that the “Jacobs” and the “Red Stews” in our lives are offering to us.
       Instead, God wants to take what is cheap and fake in our lives (our addictions), so that He could give us something much, much better (our holy ambitions).
       Give up your addiction.
       Give up what is counterfeit.
Give up what destroys you.
Give up what pulls you away from God and life and happiness.

       Like Jenny, you deserve better.

       May your dreams come true,


       Bo Sanchez

Your Successes Come From Your Struggles

Let’s imagine a crazy scene…

Imagine a tourist who goes on a trip to the Vatican. And while walking through St. Peter’s Baslica,the church of the Pope, he oohed and aahed at everything he saw. Especially when he saw the most popular sculpture in the world—The Pieta.

As he gazed at this particular statue, he didn’t realize that it was already evening. All of a sudden, he heard the giant doors of the church close. Immediately, the lights went out. And he discovered he was the only one inside. He got afraid and was about to run towards the doors when the unthinkable happened…

The Pieta spoke up! The statue said, “Don’t worry, in ten minutes, another guard will be walking around…”

Of course, the man wanted to run away. But his curiosity was stronger than his fear. So he asked, “Who…who…who are you? Are… are… are you Mother Mary?”

The sculpture spoke, “Nah, of course not. I’m just the statue. I’m The Pieta.”

Inexplicably, the man calmed down and said, “You’re an incredible work of art. You’re so beautiful…”

The statue said, “Would you believe? Once upon a time, I wasn’t beautiful at all. Once upon a time, no one wanted to look at me.”

“You’ve got to be kidding!” the tourist asked.

“Once upon a time, I was an ugly block of stone. I was in an old warehouse, together with other ugly-looking blocks of marble. We had no shape. We had no distinctions. We were nobodies.”

“And then what happened?” the man asked.

“Well, one fateful day, a young man walked in the warehouse. And this 25-year old kid looked at me in a queer way. Like he saw something in me. While everyone else saw marble, he saw a masterpiece. He walked around me, looking at me from different angles. He kept gazing, observing, studying me, it was unnerving. Finally, he asked a few men to carry me into his house. And that’s when the torture began…”

“What do you mean?” asked the tourist.

“Well, I learned that this guy’s name was Michaelangelo. And he started drawing pencil marks on me. Thousands of pencil marks. And it was slightly painful. More importantly, I felt violated!  But then he put his pencil down and he picked up a metal stick… with a sharp point at the end. I cringed. I asked myself, “What is he going to do with that thing?” Somehow, I knew this wasn’t going to be good. That was when he placed that metal thing on me—and then I saw him holding a hammer in his other hand!  I froze in terror.  And WHAM! The pain was horrendous. What shook me was seeing little pieces of me on the floor. This Michaelangelo was a violent lunatic! But I didn’t know he was just starting his work. I didn’t know it was the first of many, many blows…”

“How many?” the tourist asked.

The Pieta said, “Tens of thousands of blows. Probably more. I lost count. All I knew was that those blows lasted for 8 long years.”

       “My goodness!”

       “But finally, the chiseling stopped in 1499. And lo and behold, I was beautiful. And I’ve been beautiful these past 500 years….”

       The tourist said, “And the most wanted, most valuable, most famous sculpture in the entire history of the world.”

       Suddenly, the security guard opened the massive doors of the church and saw him. “Oh, you’re still inside? Sorry about that…”

       “Not at all. I was able to spend quality time withThe Pieta…”

       The guard nodded. “Yep, it’s beautiful, isn’t it?”

       “More than I ever imagined,” the tourist smiled.

You’re God’s Masterpiece

Michaelangelo said that when he makes a marble statue, his role is to simply “liberate” the masterpiece that is trapped inside the marble.

Friend, you are that marble, God is the Sculptor, and He is creating a masterpiece out of you.

When God sees you, He just doesn’t see you as you are now. Like a sculptor that gazes upon a block of marble, He already sees your beauty and glory and wonder trapped inside you. God’s role is to liberate the masterpiece in you!

God’s Chisel

And do you know what is the chosen chisel of God? 

Pain. 

I do not know what your pain is right now.

Perhaps your pain comes from your family. Or from a lingering sickness. Or from a strained relationship. Or from a mountain of debt. Or from difficult people in your life.

God says, “The beautiful YOU is already inside you. And I allow pain in your life to bring that beauty out of you.”

Think about it. Aren’t these two things very different?

                                     

  

Yet they’re essentially the same thing.

In my life, God has done MORE through my struggles than through my successes. If you study my successes, you’ll see that it’s made up of raw ingredients coming from my struggles. 

My struggles became the pathway to my successes.

Are you in pain? Are you struggling now?

Don’t EVER give up.

May your dreams come true,

Bo Sanchez

What Is YOUR Special Gift?

Last week, I said that in order to hit your mission in life, you need to align 3 things: your passion, your potential, and your purpose. 

Today, I’d like to talk about potential.

You see, passion isn’t enough to discover your purpose.

I know some people who love singing but singing doesn’t love them. One day, a woman come up to me and told me, “Brother Bo, I heard God tell me, ‘I’m calling you to sing to the world.”   She proceeded to give me a sample of her singing. And as I listened to her, I wondered if she heard wrongly. Perhaps God told her, ‘I’m calling you to sting the world.’” Because that was what I was experiencing at that moment. She wasn’t a singing sensation, she was a stinging sensation.

You need to identify your potential, your special gift. God has given you one. And it’s very simple to find out what it is. Ask yourself, “Where do I excel? What one thing do I do that when I do it, people are blessed?”

This is your core gift. And this is how you become a superstar.

Face it. People love superstars. People like to deal with superstars. People will buy from superstars. People will listen to the music of superstars, watch the sports of superstars, eat in restaurants with superstar chefs, wear the clothes of superstar brands, and read the books of superstar authors.

Here’s my belief: God has given you a unique gift that will make you a superstar in your world. God is telling you today, Do not neglect your gift. (1 Timothy 4:14)

       If you find your unique gift, develop your unique gift, and resist the temptation to divert away from your gift—you’ll be Number One. 

80% Of Your Life Should Be About Your Special Gift

       I’m not saying, “Abandon everything else you’re doing.” My gift is in speaking and writing, but I still do other stuff like running my businesses, leading a lot of meetings, and pioneering new projects. Those things are still necessary, and I have to do them. But I focus at least 80% of my productive time in what I do best—speaking and writing.  

       And when I say superstar, I’m not suggesting that you be superstar of the entire world.

       Just the superstar of your niche.

Be A Niche Superstar

       Let me give you an example.

       I’m not the best preacher in the world.

Again, my mother will disagree, but please be quiet about it and don’t burst her bubble. She’s 87 years old and I want her to live the remaining 23 years of her life on earth (yes, she’ll live until 110) with the belief that I’m the best preacher in the world. So Shhhhhhh…

But this I can accept. I think I’m one of the best (1) Lay, (2) Catholic, (3) Filipinopreachers who preach on (4) practical topics, (5) especially in the area of personal finance, personal health, and personal relationships, (6) that speak in a very simple and down-to-earth way, (7) who always gives it from a spiritual perspective, (8) whose audience is primarily the English-speaking crowd, (9) funny in a corny way, and (10) who has a huge black mole on BOTH of his ears. In that tiny, tiny, tiny, tiny, tiny niche, I’m a superstar.

       Question: How can you be a superstar in your niche?

       Define yourself.

       Mark your boundaries and call it your property.

Let me give you a very simple example about my property…

Focus On Your Strength—Forget Your Weakness

Here’s my niche: I preach mainly in English. 

Which is a problem. Because I can’t reach the majority of the Philippine population. And believe me, I want to! I still feel a pinch of envy when I hear my fellow Feast preachers preach in fluent, spontaneous, powerful Tagalog—and they connect to all sorts of crowds—something I can never do.

Regularly, I get comments from Facebook and my blog, telling me, “Brother Bo, please preach in Tagalog so we can understand you more.”

But today, I realize that this is what God wants me to do—to preach and write in English.

Yes, I can keep on working on my Tagalog preaching. But no matter how much I try doing that, I’m ashamed to say that I can’t preach in Tagalog in the same level that I preach in English. If you heard me preach in Tagalog and were impressed, don’t be. I was probably giving one of my memorized Tagalog talks. (I have 3 of them!)

Yes, I can preach in Tagalog adequately, but I always sound… uh, queer. Let me give you an analogy. When I preach in English, I feel like I’m driving the fastest motorbike in the world. My thoughts and words flow like the wind.

But when I preach in Tagalog, I feel like I’m riding this rusty bicycle overloaded with stuff in my mind that I can’t express…

 

Again, I’m not proud of this.

I don’t even have a Filipino accent. Years ago, when I preached in the US, Americans think I live there. Some of them asked me, “What State were you born? California?” I told them, “No, I was born in the State of Caloocan.” They get surprised why I speak the way I do. “Did you grow up here perhaps?” they asked.

I told them, “Well, I lived in Chicago for 20+ years.”

“I knew it, ” they smiled.

“Every morning, from Chicago, I turn right to New York, turn left to Aurora Boulevard until I reach Araneta Coliseum.”

This conversation happened years ago. That doesn’t happen anymore today. When you speak without a Filipino accent in America, they now ask, “Do you work in a Call Center?”

       Why do I preach in English? I see two twists of fate that made me speak this way…

       First reason: I was born to parents who spoke only two languages—English and Spanish. Since I felt that Spanish wasn’t very useful for me, I grew up speaking only English.

       Second reason: When I was one year old, Dad’s company transferred him to Cebu. We lived there for 8 years. As a kid, I learned Cebuano, not Tagalog. But when I transferred back to Manila at 9 years old, I forgot my Cebuano and wasn’t great in Tagalog.

       It’s Divine Orchestration. Through my history, God prepared me to preach in English.

       But here’s a fact. When you have a strength, you also have a weakness. And that’s okay. Let me give you my controversial point: Focus on your strength and forget your weakness. Often, our school system aims to produce well-rounded students who are jack-of-all-trades, but masters of none. Believe me, that’s the recipe for mediocrity. Successful people aren’t well-rounded people—they’re extremely fantastic in one specific field and a total nincompoop in other fields.

I can write a book in five days with ease. But I can’t dance.

I can give a whole day seminar in my sleep. But I can’t memorize the multiplication table. (I keep forgetting what’s 8 x 7 and 9 x 6…)

Goodness, I can’t even replace a light bulbdecently. Believe me, I tried. Three weeks ago, my wife asked me to change the light bulb above our bed. So I stood on the bed and reached up. The light fixture slipped off my hands and it shattered to a thousand pieces. My wife looked at me and said, “Bo, go back to preaching.”

Do you want to be successful in life? Focus, focus, focus. Be good in one thing. Be a master of one skill and make that your special gift to the world.

       Next week, I’ll give you my final installment of this message on passion, potential, and purpose…

       May your dreams come true,

       Bo Sanchez

Do You Want To Succeed? Work On Your Patterns.

I always teach people that if you want to know who you’ll be 10 years from now, list down the 5 people you spend the MOST time today—write down their strengths, their weaknesses, their passions, even their incomes—average them—and that’s who you’ll be 10 years from now.

Why does that happen? Because of the power of patterns.

The first persons that influenced you are your parents. That’s why the Bible talks about the reality of “Generational Sin” in Exodus 34:7. It says, “I lay the sins of the parents upon their children and grandchildren; the entire family is affected–even children in the third and fourth generations.”

       How does this generational sin work?

For example, when the husband is unfaithful to his wife, the children see his example. Living with a father that is unfaithful will influence them to repeat the same sin in their own lives. (I didn’t say define them. Justinfluence them.)

       Do all children follow the sins of their parents? Of course not. It’s still a personal choice. But they do have very bad models.

But what if the father hides his sin from his children? Will they still be affected? I don’t believe one can hide it. We’re spiritual beings. Deep down, subconsciously, they already know.

But here’s the Good News: You can cut the effect of generational sin. What are the sins of your fathers and mothers? Cut the curse of generational sin in your life today. It should stop in YOUR generation. You can decide to stop passing onto your children the sin you inherited from your parents and grandparents. Come to God now and seek His power. He will transform what was meant to curse your family into a blessing.

How? Follow Jesus.

I was talking to a man whose mother was hopelessly addicted to gambling. She would lie to him, steal from him, and steal from other people, only so that she could gamble in a Casino. He felt so bad that his mother was like this. I told him, “You see the condition of your mother as a curse to you and your family. But trust in God that even this awful situation will turn out to be a blessing for your future. I don’t know how. But this part of your history will prepare you for your greater destiny.”

My friend is following Jesus with this whole heart. I believe he has cut the generational sin in his family.

This reminds me of the story of Margaret.

14 Years In Prison

Margaret was born a hunchback, dwarf, deformed, lame, and blind. And she didn’t have very good parents. Her parents, Parisio and Emilia, was so ashamed of her, they imprisoned her in a tiny cell far from their house. How long did she stay in that prison?  14 years. 

One day, when her parents realized there was really no cure for her deformity, they simply abandoned her. 

By God’s grace, a kindly priest came to know her and introduced God to her. And she gave her life to Jesus. 

That was how she responded to her situation. Let me say this very important point again: Your past doesn’t define your future. Yes, your past influences, affects, and disturbs your future. But it doesn’t define your future. What defines your future is your RESPONSE to your past… And this was how Margaret responded to her horrific past: She followed Jesus.

She was able to go out of her prison and join the Dominican Third Order. 

Here’s the massive blessing: Because of the suffering she went through, she understood the suffering of others. Because she was imprisoned for 14 years as a child, she knew what it meant to be imprisoned. She would visit prisoners and share God’s Love to them.   Because she was physically deformed, she understood the sick. So she would visit hospitals and share God’s Love to the sick and dying.

Let me tell you the bigger miracle in her life.  Despite all her suffering in the hands of her cruel parents, being locked up in prison for 14 long years, Margaret grew up to be a very happy woman. Her friends said that they never heard her complain about life. They never heard her complain about others. Discouragement was a word she did not know.

Because she followed Jesus, the curse of generational sin was cut in her life. Her past didn’t hold her prisoner. She was free—because she followed Jesus.

Because of this, the Catholic Church beatified her—and she is the patron saint of the crippled and unwanted. Her incorrupt body lies in the church in Castello, Italy.

Margaret’s past was not perfect. In fact, it was evil. But it prepared her for her purpose.   As the Bible says, what was intended by the enemy to harm you, God will transform it for your good (see Genesis 50:20).

When you look at your past, especially when you look at all the suffering you went through, don’t be discouraged.   Every detail of your history—both good and bad—will bring you closer to your destiny.

Let me say it again: Your past may not be perfect, but it was perfect for your purpose.

May your dreams come true,

Bo Sanchez

Are You Insane Enough To Love Your Enemies…

Have you been hurt by others? Offended? Betrayed? Slandered? Maligned? Gossiped about? Cheated on? Stolen from?

Then I’m writing to you.

It could be small stuff. If you’re a driver, and some other “idiot” driver cuts you off, do you have this urge to press on the accelerator, overtake that car, and cut him off as well? Do you like to give him a dose of his own medicine?

Today, God will teach you the insanity of loving your enemies. I know it’s difficult. Impossible, even. But here’s a big promise: If you do this, streams of healing will flow into your life.

Yuck!

What I’m about to tell you is distasteful stuff.

We knew Jesus said, “Love your enemies.” We heard this command since we were kids.

But for crying out loud, we never thought He meant it literally. We thought that when Jesus said, “Love your enemies,” He meant, “Don’t shoot your enemy with a machine gun,” or “Don’t poison your enemy with cyanide,” or “Don’t axe the head of your enemy so his head rolls off and you can kick it off a cliff and you can watch his head bounce down a thousand feet below…” But somehow, we thought we could still hit our enemy a couple of times on the head with a lead pipe—at least to injure him. 

But Jesus was serious.

When Jesus said, “Love your enemies,” He meant that we really, genuinely, actively, concretely, go out of our way, think of the other person’s wellbeing, wish him the person’s wellbeing, pray for the wellbeing, and actually do something for our enemy’s wellbeing! 

Yuck! 

Can you think of anything more repulsive than that?

But He meant it…

He said, You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven.  (Matthew 5:43-48)

To Be Fully Blessed, You Need To Fully Obey

Some people complain to me, “Why isn’t God blessing me?”

       Here’s the truth: God is ALWAYS blessing you. The problem?  Not that God isn’t giving us blessings, but that we aren’t receiving His blessings.

One reason?  You’re not fully obeying God’s Word. (Note: This isn’t the only reason for suffering. Some very holy people suffer for other reasons.)

For example, when God says, “Love your enemies,” are we really doing it? Let me say this to you loud and clear: I believe many don’t receive the fullness of God’s blessings because you have not yet learned to love your enemies.

God stated how we should love our enemies. He didn’t leave it to our imagination. He listed down explicit instructions on how to love our enemies.

Insane Instructions

The Bible even tells us practical ways to love our enemies. If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head. Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.(Romans 12:20-21)

Gosh. God’s instruction is absolutely insane, it’s tempting to think that God was joking. 

Usually, if our enemy is hungry, we don’t think of feeding him—We think of making fun of him. We want to gloat and say, “Ha! May you starve to death. May your big intestines eat your own small intestines so that you start digesting your flesh and blood until you die a horrible death.”

And when we see our enemy thirsty, we want to say, “Good for you! Serves you right. You deserve it. May you go so thirsty, your tongue becomes so dry, it crumbles to dust…”

But God says, “Feed your enemy when he is hungry. Give a drink to your enemy when he is thirsty.”

Believe me, to do this, you need a miracle from God.

A Deep Hurt

Let me tell you a story that’s very close to my heart…

In 1987, Light of Jesus Family was only 7 years old.

We were still very small, somewhere between 200 to 300 members. There were very few preachers in the community and I was thankful that one of our Elders, let’s call him Ric, was a very effective preacher. A lot of people admired Ric for his deep knowledge of the Bible.

Because of this, I always felt Ric and his wife Gemma were big blessings to the Light of Jesus.

Back then, Ric worked as an insurance salesman. But soon after joining us, he left his job and became a fulltime leader for Light of Jesus. And the community gave him a small monthly allowance. He also asked me if Light of Jesus could pay for his post-graduate Bible courses—and we supported him.

Ric and I also became next-door neighbors. We worked so closely together that Ric and Gemma moved in a duplex right beside the community center—which was my parents’ home. Ric and Gemma lived in one apartment and I lived in the other—with just a thin wall between us.

There were many lovely nights we’d just hang out together in their apartment or my apartment, chatting and laughing over a big bottle of Coke and peanuts. Those were beautiful times of friendship. I didn’t know that those happy times were about to come to an end…

A Punch In The Stomach

One morning, I heard a knock on the front door. I opened it and Ric was standing there, looking very pensive. “Can I talk to you Bo?” 

“Sure!” I said. I followed him into his apartment.

We sat in front of each other in his living room. Ric blurted the news, “Bo, I’m leaving Light of Jesus…”

At first, I didn’t understand. I kept quiet and allowed him to speak.

Ric continued, “I believe God is calling me to build my church. And more than twenty people in Light of Jesus are leaving the community and joining me…”

I felt Manny Pacquiao punched me on my solar plexus.  (Correction. This happened in 1987 and Manny was yet a kid. So the more accurate description is that I felt Muhammad Ali punched me in the solar plexus.) It was difficult to breathe. I tried to digest what he was saying. Ric, my friend of 5 long years, was leaving. His wife Gemma—also a dear friend—was leaving too. Not only that, more than twenty of my friends were going with him. And they weren’t only leaving Light of Jesus. They were leaving the Catholic Church and setting up their own church.

A wave of profound sadness washed over me. Ric had campaigned behind my back. He held underground meetings, inviting his friends to join him in his new church.

“Bo, I know this is difficult for you but I have to do this,” I heard Ric say—or at least something like that. Because by that time, I couldn’t hear him very well.  The throbbing pain inside me was deafening.

Bless, Not Curse

I walked out of his apartment and went to my room.

In my room, I sat down and cried to God. 

And while praying, God spoke to my heart.

I heard God say, “Bo, love your enemies. Bless, do not curse. Love, do not hate. Feed the hungry. Give drink to the thirsty. Don’t let good be overcome with evil. Instead, overcome evil with good.”

A few days later, we had a Light of Jesus prayer meeting. We were so small, we knew that some people were missing. People were asking, “Where’s Brother Ric? Where are Brother Ric’s friends?” So I stood up on stage and did one of the most difficult things I remember doing. I announced, “Friends, Brother Ric has decided to leave and start a new church. More than twenty of our members are going with him…”

A loud gasp shook the room.

As I explained more details, people began to sob around me. Others were very angry. Some were so angry at Ric, I heard them say, “Ric betrayed Bo! Ric betrayed us! Ric will never succeed! Their work will never be blessed by God!”

I raised my arms to quiet the increasing buzz in the room. “I’m very hurt by what happened. I’m as hurt as all of you are. But I’ve prayed to God about this matter. And it’s very clear in my heart that God wants us to bless them, not curse them. God wants us to love them, not hate them.”

Everyone stood up, and with many tears, we prayed together. I said, “Lord, we pray that you bless Ric. We pray that you prosper the work of his hands. We pray that Ric and his church will serve You and serve Your people…”

After praying for them, I knew I had to do one more thing—I had to visit Ric in his new church…

Love, Not Hate

When I walked in their rented venue, I saw our former members, cleaning, sweeping, and mopping the hall.

They were shocked when they saw me. “Brother Bo!” they all greeted me.

Ric was now Pastor Ric. He came up to me and we hugged each other for a long time. “Thank you for coming, Bo,” he said.

“I’m here to bless you,” I told him.

We formed a circle and we prayed together. Again, I prayed that God bless them.

I went around and hugged everyone in the room.

Before I left, I dug into my pocket. At that time, I was a poor 21-year old missionary, so I had very little money. But what I had, I gave. “This is my love offering to you,” I told them.

While driving home, there were tears in my eyes. But they were no longer tears of pain but tears of love. I realized all the hurt and heaviness in my heart was being sucked out by love. It was amazing. I felt a lightness in my spirit. Love really healed!

A Tragic Happy Ending

I wish I could tell you that this story ends in a totally happy way. Sadly, Ric’s new church didn’t last. At first, they were growing. But after a few years of exciting growth, his members dispersed and the church closed down. 

And Ric went back to selling insurance. 

When I heard about it, my heart felt sad for Ric. I’m a preacher, so I know what happens when a preacher stops preaching. When a preacher doesn’t preach, something dies in him.

Fifteen years after leaving Light of Jesus, Ric called me up to sell me insurance. We met for lunch and it was like old times. We talked and laughed together. I also bought insurance from him and referred him to my friends.

He also told me he wanted to preach again—but didn’t know how. I felt sad that this once-upon-a-time great preacher was no longer using his gift. I prayed for him that God give him an opportunity to do so.

I was happy to hear that a group invited him to give a talk—and Ric was very happy.

But soon after that, one day, I received a phone call from his wife Gemma. With her voice shaking, she said, “Brother Bo, Ric had a heart attack. God called him home…”

It was a sudden departure. The only consolation I had was the fact that before he died, we reconnected again.

Soon after that, Gemma rejoined Light of Jesusand became a Catholic again. She served the Lord with passion at the PICC Feast.  She even worked fulltime in one of our ministries.  

When she was 59 years old, God blessed her with a wonderful man who fell in love with her. Gemma got married a second time and they live a happy life together.

Why am I telling you this story?

To tell you that my life has been blessed beyond my wildest imagination. I’m surrounded by a wonderfully HUGE family and the most loving friends. I’m doing the most exciting things on planet earth. I cannot begin to describe how blessed I am!  

Why? One reason I can think of:  Because when I was 21 years old, God taught me to love my enemies. When you love your enemies, you open your life to so much blessings.

Who are your enemies?

Don’t just refrain from doing bad to them.

God wants you to do good to them.

Look, I’m NOT saying that a wife should continue to stay with a physically or emotionally abusive husband (Run away!); Or that an adult child should continue to give money to his mother who is a compulsive gambler (Don’t do that!); That’s not what I’m talking about. These extreme cases comprise 1% of my audience. 

I’m talking to the other 99% who need to hear this message.

Ask for His guidance. 

What can you do to express your love to your “enemies” today?

May your dreams come true,

Bo Sanchez